Tuesday, September 30, 2008

The Aimlessness of being sad

How hard it is to not be sad.Sadness is such a waste. I never realised it could be worse than anger. Anger at least makes you DO something.Sadness just makes you reflect. And everything is diffused.And everyone who smiles is like mocking at you.Every loud word you hear is like someone yelling at you.I hate being yelled at. I hate loud words.I hate talks.I dont know why I am writing this.I have known writing to be a form of therapy.I am fishing for some kinda rest.I am fishing for some good things, some goodness. I would like to think that its just the fact that I am failing is making me sad.But the fact of others winning is making me sadder.I guess I am a bad person and all this mask of pretensions i wear is just falling apart.I am writing and deleting.It shouldnt be that way.I am wishing to talk with people who would just listen and maybe understand, but I know they cant. I wouldnt if I were them and they were going through this. Maybe I wouldnt have cared.Maybe they dont care either.what the hell.I might destroy somethings. I take things too personally.


De.vile said...

Call me if you need a patient listener

Anonymous said...

de villiieeee

i wanna talk to u too


i like to talk when i do things

Anonymous said...

call me deville I will try to be patient as well :)

Anonymous said...

i will be your patient, deville

Anonymous said...

deville, ashes is not gonna call you ok. pls mind it.

Anonymous said...

deville, 2 mouses want to talk to u

same time

u like being threesome?

Anonymous said...

hey!! mouseies

dont do threesome

this sadass sasha may walk in any time.

Anonymous said...

and deville might defrock us like she did to the knights.

am skared

Anonymous said...

how come dis deville commented first?

stole our spot :(

Anonymous said...

Love me or hate me

It's still an obsession

Love me or hate me

That is the question

And if you love me then 'thank you'
And if you hate me then 'f--- you'

Anonymous said...

sandu will be here later. he is in class.

Anonymous said...

mose and deville

do whatever freaks you up

but not on my sheets

my bai will be angry

you freaks!!

Anonymous said...

does deville ask to be called up frm sandu baba?

Anonymous said...

hey ikkadar,

i changed the names to sadu pandu and mandu

frm you-knew-those-names

bandu is a reserve name.

god gracious, grant me 3 sons.

Anonymous said...

lata came home early morning that day. i opened the door for her and she smiled at me, shy-ly. she had washed her hair and she was wearing a skirt and top, as it is common these areas.

she started cleaning the dishes. i had made coffee for myself and shared it up with her. she was pleasatly surprised and accepted it. she was still shy and i could not start a comunication with her.

i went to my room and tried to sleep more. i could not, i was still thinking of her wet spread hair and her shyness and her tight top. i woke up and went to the hall and pretended to watch tv.

i could see her from the side. she was squatting while washing the dishes and her skirt was pulled up above her knees. i could clearly see her bosom and it was heaving as she finishes washing all the dishes.

"raju ji, can i wash and mop the floor now?" she asked and i could not help noticing her skirt dropping below her knees as she stood up.

Ashes said...

de.vile--i know.but i'm too mad and in some deep hole.will talk asap.

anonymouses writing about de.vile--cut the crap,this is MY blog and i am an egoist.write about ME.

anonymouse with the story--shut the F up..its not even funny

Anonymous said...

heyyyyy sasha

why you in a hole?

there is no hole to speak of

it is all how yu think

we mouses like ou

get yourself up and thereare lots of hottt girls to have fun with

of course, we will be practise safe

Anonymous said...

sandu is an annoy mouse too?/



Anonymous said...

sashaaaa....deville seems to like you and she is lending hear ears for you.

you never make a gurl wait!!! have not you been taught in life how to be a gentleman?

and men don't cry or despair. unless they start paying alimony.

not the real ones!!!!!

hope this helps.

call deville now!!!!

-- Minnie-mouse.

De.vile said...

If you weren't 60, I'd have asked to fuck off long time back. I really don't like having to deal with you so just keep off, right?

Anonymous said...

not right deville. you baddasss gurl. you lending your ears to ashes patiently. lend to us also NO! we will return it back to u with interest ya. pls mind ur language kindly

Anonymous said...

ashes u an egoist crackpot hiding in some hole. why is the raju-bai story annoying to you? if you can write about sadness, fear and whatever else why can mouses write about the state of today's female servants and the outfits they wear?

Anonymous said...

hey ashes-deville...record your phone conversation and post it on your blog. we would like to be in loop of what is going on.

thanks :)

Anonymous said...

sandu please dont start with your mouse rhymes. it sucks.

hey ikkadar mouse. you will be blessed with 3 sons - sadu pandu and mandu.

am doubtful about pandu...better check his skirt...I mean pants

Anonymous said...

ashes and deville phone conversation is better than sarah palin and joe biden debate!

am informing CNN to follow this phone conversation closely.

Anonymous said...

i want to hear deville's "meltdown"


Anonymous said...

that will be another like a 10 hour documentary!

Anonymous said...

hello good morning deville sweetie.

Anonymous said...

goodnight deville sweetypoo

Anonymous said...

:( miss you sweetypie

and yeah, tighttttttttttt hugggggggssss

Anonymous said...

tight hugsssssss

hugggyypoooo >:d<

miss youssss

see u sooonly :) :)

Jimmy said...

I remember Janice
she never had a sad day in her life

even when she was dying

Anonymous said...

Hi friends
Do not miss your chance to get a free ipad. Visit http://bit.ly/d9QOON